mermen-loving-mermen:

Date a boy who is only ever seen in the produce section of Publix. Date a boy who probably lives in the produce section of Publix. Date a boy who is unnervingly pale and dark-haired due to the fact that he probably has never been outside of the produce section of Publix. Date a boy who may or may not be a produce vampire, sucking the nutrients out of the fruit and veg in the produce section of Publix as his only form of sustenance.